Until the beat drops

Don’t worry my love, it’s not a big deal. I know your schedule is complicated and I don’t want to stretch you beyond the limits of the life you want and are creating for yourself. I would still love to see you of course. I’m sure we’ll eventually find an opportunity when the time is right.

I see it differently now (vs 2 years ago ie), so I don’t want you to stress or feel guilty about this time not working out! I’m sure there’ll be another time that spontaneously works out and our stars align ❤️

I love you and I hope you’re having a great week!

It makes me very happy to know that you’re going after the life you want.

It’s a part of me I’ve been nurturing in myself the past years as well—knowing how to balance it with friends and other priorities, so I know it’s hard, and things are never perfect, especially at this stage of life.

I’m here for you unconditionally. I know it hasn’t always felt that way, and for that I’m deeply regretful.

Thank you for giving me the space to grow as well. I appreciate you.

Rooting for you,

A

I work in research now, and I approach it in a way that makes it truly “creative work” in the essence of the term. I understand that the spontaneity and uncertainty is essential to anything truly creative (which to me is the same term as innovative).

In the past, I’ve wanted to force concrete plans and have “certainty”, because that’s what I thought was the “responsible” thing to do. I don’t do that anymore. The narrative of what was responsible, was so engrained in me, even when I disagreed with it.

For so long, I’ve been ashamed of the spontaneous and “chaotic” side of myself. And have gone through ups and downs of accepting this urge and the true gift it is.

It’s something I’ve always known was a part of me, and I know it’s a part of you too, which I know is why I connected with you so much when we first met. And I want you to know that I not only accept that as part of your life, but see that it is what makes you positively special, and appreciate you for it.

Please don’t feel bad when something like this happens again. I don’t want my past reaction to haunt our friendship.

I can’t wait to continue experiencing life with you.

So much love,

A